Well, OK, not really.

I mean, he might (and if he does, YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST!!!!), but not that I know of. Come to think of it, he probably doesn't. I think one has to reach puberty before they can procreate. At least that is what I learned in public school. But still, the Jonass Brothers totally suck.

I know, I know. What an original and timely sentiment it was that I just expressed. Look at me, "breaking the mold" and declaring that the Jonas family three-some is in dire near of euthenasia. What a rebel I am! Daring cross the Disney-produced darlings with my 

But whatever. I think they are just atrocious. Are they geared or aimed at me and my tastes? No. So why am I upset? I dunno. I just am. I can't explain it. I really get truly angered towards these three Hanson rip-offs. Maybe that is what it is. I hated Hanson, but as the years have gone by I have been able to look back and see their musical talent, no matter how small. I don't see any of that with this current tween-scene trio.

And Perez LOVES the three boys. The three teenage boys. Perez Hilton loves these three innocent teenage boys. Shouldn't that be a cause for concern? Shouldn't we be sheltering them from his garlic-scented 

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People with actual access to musicians (or at least, musicians that aren't soliciting us for mySpace love), are reporting that Lenny Kravitz, perhaps best known for being drafted by the Jewish conglomerate on Chappelle's Show, is currently in the studio with the newly Scott Weiland-less "Velvet Revolver." So they pretty much just traded out a heroin-crazed lead singer for a virginal, glorified coverband lead singing Hendrix ripoff. Nice Slash, nice.  

While this most likely will amount to a pile of unadulterated suck that dares reach "Carl Lewis Does Music" levels, there is always a chance that this unique pairing could result into something shockingly listen-able. Doubtful. 

Let it be known however that I was never too keen on the original V.E. line-up and perhaps that is where many of my feelings eminante from. But I also think that they totes suck. Yeah, that might be better reason.  

For more on how bad Carl Lewis is, lock the doors and watch the following music video.

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Hey friends, Adam here.

Guess what: I think that "La Bamba" sucks. Not only does it suck, I felt passionately enough about it to write a longer-than-necessary article about my distain for the Latin-flavored dance hit.

Sadly, I am unable to post it here at Rockworms, but if you are interested in finding out more, you can run over to the Happy Good-Times Joy Fun Blog and read the whole thing. If you want a preview (and I knooooooooow that you do) here is a small taste:

If you would have told musical genius Buddy Holly, J.P. Richardson aka music’s “The Big Bopper” and Ritchie Valen’s prior to their boarding of their V-Tail Beechcraft Bonanza at Mason City Municipal Airport, the most lasting artifact of their three storied careers that the most well-known song of these three esteemed and treasured musicians would be the often lyrically misunderstood and incessantly mocked Latino-themed dance anthem, “La Bamba”, do you think that their, deservingly so, enragement at this statement would have been enough that they would not have boarded the plane that day? -Adamcozens.com

How will it end? Will I ever find peace in that a pop song is sometimes, just a pop song? Will I discover that there is a secret, hidden meaning to "La Bamba" ala "La Cucaracha?" All this and more exclusively at the Happy Good-Times Joy Fun Blog . 

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Us editors here at the world-famous Rockworms Dot Com have had many conversations regarding how the posting of videos just for the sake of posting videos. Sure, it's easy and it gets content and visitors to your site, but we are about more than that. We are about quality content, fun and informative writing and the discovery of good, new music.

On that note, I am going to post a video of a popular hip-hop star covering a 90's rock song at a festival in England. Don't judge me.


For those unfamiliar with the rationale', Noel Gallagher from Oasis was publicly slamming the festival for putting Jay-Z in the line-up this year. I guess this was the Jigga-man's rebuttal. For bonus fun, check out the 2nd verse of 99 Problems. Tite. Enjoy.  

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6:54 – I made it! Madison Square Garden! The world’s most famous arena! Yeeeaaaaah!

7:00 – I can’t find my seat. I’m going where they are telling me to go, but my seat is not there.

7:06 – OK, I was about 4 levels too high. *Phew*, that’s a relief at least. For the amount I spend on these tickets I was nervous they were going to STILL suck.

7:10 – The National is starting inside. I’m still in the wrong section. Should I just sit down and watch from here? Nope. Security ain’t having that. Shouldn’t they have a policy in place that if your seat is FAR superior to the one you are attempting to squat in, you may sit there? Sounds reasonable.

7:13 – I am nervous to ask this person customer service person where my seat is because I am pretty sure I asked her already and she looked at me like I was amazingly stupid then!

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In an era where "To Catch a Predator" dominates the airwaves, "Net Nanny" is laying down the law on the internet and sting operations across the country have been cracking down on day-to-day real world illegal perversions, it is somehow nice to know that at least ONE segment of the American population is immune to punishment for their documented and evidence-filled crimes against youth: black R&B singers.

Despite overwhelming evidence to the guilt of both these men, juries have free'd each of them for reasons that continue to perplex the average news-coverage follower. Michael Jackson, with his history of sketchy actions involving youth and matter-of-fact statements that he had often allowed young boys to sleep in his bed with him was still released back into the public by a jury of his peers after his guilt could not be officially verified. And in news that just broke this last Friday, 90's throb-tastic hit machine R. Kelly was found innocent on all charges that he appeared in a home video having sex and urinating on a 14 year-old girl. As a witness to the film, I have no question at all that Mr. Kelly was in fact the man in the short film, but once again, a jury of his peers let him go.

Is white guilt rearing it's pale head again? In a world where we are practically stumbling over ourselves to lock away those who endanger our children, why are we freeing the two most public cases of underage sexual assault in the modern era? It's astonishing. 

Yeah, I guess I just wanted to write something because everyone else was covering the R. Kelly story. I dunno.  

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I personally would have no qualms writing out the uncensored version of the title, but I'm sure someone would give me crap for it. So it gets the asterisk. Meh.

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The academy awarded the Alaskan blonde a plaque (and hopefully some pocket cash) for selling 18 million albums domestically in her career. She has sold almost 30 million worldwide and judging from the award, they apperantly don't expect her to sell too many more. Ouch.

She is 34. Tough luck.

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How about that, somebody remixed Alice in Wonderland so that you don't have to be high, or 5 (high 5!?!?) to enjoy it! Mad props the Aussie DJ "Pogo" for creating this uber cool tune using actual sounds from the movie as 90% of his source material.

Pogo (shown to the right) is even offering a free MP3 of this track here through Last.fm. 

Thanks Pogo!  Good luck with puberty, we hope you're just as cool afterwards.

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